Boxed

And there are many layers now, I can't tell anymore..
But what I know is that I couldn't look at you
It may break
And it may pour
The guard may be gone.

Maybe it's the wee hours of the night
Or the tiring of laughter
Maybe it's the lack of understanding
And the frustrations hidden in the running water and soapy dishes

Or maybe it's the hardened hearts
Who claim to have forgiveness
But again and once again
Dig up the old

May be the putting away of life into boxes
And finding memories that bring joy to the dull
Yet into the boxes it has to go
And a new box when the other becomes full

It may be the words spoken
But no longer matters
Because it's done

Or the words spoken
With such urgency
That brings stress to one

And maybe, it just may be the high hopes I have on myself
And on you
That brings such frustration
But forgetting that it is solely on You that high hopes should lie
...

after LBC retreat

today i went along the road
- where troubles once were washed away and shaken by a huge storm raging with thunder and lightening.
it was frightening, it was thrilling, there was pleading

for safety
for cleansing
for clarity.

and so today, the sky is blue, with clouds fluffy and white.
this time on wheels, cruising by.
remembering the first trip, steps - one by one, drowned by the heavy drops of rain, with the consistency of pouring buckets of water.
it was slow, painful, tiring.

but this second trip was lighter, faster, brighter.
filled with hope, though uncertainties, but faith.
with you in the backseat, though here, we will be clear.


weekend, uncertainties came rushing
revived in hope, clarity

nights

Cold, starry night, talk, clarity
time for time..away
Is it?
Though unclear, maybe it's the best thing to do.
May all that I do be pleasing to You.

arrows

Direction
When we feel we go. When we go, its either continue, or idle. We think we may be worse, but really we continue on in some state, forever moving.
Path
History
Experiences
Interconnected
The fragrance of Christ
77 times we fall but forgiven but because we have you we are saved through you.
Mother Teresa: 50+ years of serving, through faith and conviction, not just through unstable feelings.

wait

you know what is beautiful?
when things are created from the One and Only
when he hits the keys with flat tipped fingers
when two enjoy and laugh to a movie
when one leaves but comes back
when she listens and encourages
when she leaves, leaving one frustrated but ends up finding an outlet, and encouragement
when he stays to wait
when one welcomes with open arms
when they could care less but to satisfy their hunger cravings
when she cringes and he noticed
when he looks and smiles
when creation blooms
when quietness strikes
when warmth awaits
when the road ahead stretches
when a curb is hit, but new paths reveal
when the gear is set in motion, and brings one to places
when she is frustrated but quiet
when tears free fall

but i can't.

this is what is beautiful,

His creation

blossoms.

[rhythms] that You speak

today You spoke.
though You speak everyday, today I heard.
unfortunately, not until today.